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Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Unfinished thoughts...

This post could be what my new blog name relates to, who knows with my subconscious in charge. Here ya go, some unfinished theory straight from my inner mind.

I was hypothesizing earlier today and wonder if there is any connection between someone who suffers from a generally heightened state of anxiety, and alzheimers or dementia later in life. Those with a rich or at least 'busy' inner monologue, or subconscious existence.

I got this thought instinctually this morning, when my brain was in the middle of one of it's spirals, playing out scenario's that will likely never happen, seemingly at random. This occurs when I stop consciously controlling my thoughts and kind of 'zone out', like when you are on a bus staring into space, or in my case, pumping at work.

I believe this pattern of thought over a long period of time, is correlated with generalized anxiety, which I was diagnosed with back in College, and which I think is just one of those things, but now I wonder if it has a possible harmful effect on the way the brain stores and processes memories.

The constant flurry of thought in those 'zoned out' states, disorganized, and for the most part left unfinished, scenarios that don't complete or are missing vital info (causing a 'can't quite put my finger on it' anxiety on an almost constant basis), it feels like maybe the cause could be that chemicals/hormones are reacting to all the possible scenarios as if they are really happening, leading the person to truly experience each scenario mentally and emotionally.

If so then perhaps this is the reason anxiety, from the constant mental gymnastics and unknowns left unknown in the subconscious lead to an exhausted befuddlement. I sometimes feel as if all my thoughts have played out to such a length that they lose their elasticity, and cannot be re used for a new thought... in those moments I feel thoroughly exhausted and struggle to form clear lines of thought. It's a kind of mental exhaustion.

Sometimes I am just tired, but it feels like this could be one of the reasons why.

None of this has been researched or looked up in any way to back up my thought, but just comes from my theorizing, and subconscious wanderings, but still, it feels like I clear the air a little just getting this out for posterity.

Of course the natural antidote to this is meditation, a purposeful clearing of the mind, acknowledging thoughts as they enter, and dismissing them just as quickly. It is a mental rest, and some how a way to control the subconscious, preventing it from controlling you.

1 comment:

Sterling Lynch said...

Interesting post.

Researched or not, I think this kind of personal theorizing can be helpful. It might lead to a useful discovery for yourself or an interesting research project.

It also seems very plausible to me that anxious thinking can lead to exhaustion. If positive thinking/ imaging can make people feel better or calmer, surely negative thinking/imaging can do the opposite. It can probably even get the heart racing, too.

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